illusions that serve us

the illusions we adopt shape our reality, so choose wisely

Part of growing up is getting disillusioned with glamorous things like getting into a good college, professional club, or a big company job. Society and our environment make us think specific paths or values are “right” or “cool.'“

When we start questioning these beliefs, we can see that oftentimes they are just made up by people trying to look important or entities trying to make money. Some examples include colleges keeping admission rates low to make the degree seem more exclusive or self-help gurus preaching the hustle mentality to make you buy more self-help books.

Do we actually want this? Why do we believe in it? Thinking about what's really “true” can make us feel unmotivated and unsure of what to do.

It typically goes like this: we think getting into a [college/club/fellowship/course/job] will bring us to [a desired state], but it turns out to be different. Being open to things can be beneficial because it could lead to serendipitous encounters. But when they don't work out and we start seeing through the facade, it can lead to jadedness and the question "why bother?"

Despite this, I’ve found myself picking up valuable skills and relationships along the way. This includes professional clubs, fellowships, or internships. Meeting one good friend makes joining a disorganized club worth it. Realizing something is not for me makes the experience fruitful. If the 20% of the result could make the 80% of BS worth it, it’s not a wasted effort.

This reminded me of a podcast I came across. The person said that religion is "literally false but metaphorically true", meaning that even though religion can't be scientifically proven to be true, it remains useful and applicable to people’s lives. It provides peace, solace, and a moral standard to aim for.

So what’s the value of finding out what's truly “true”? Could this lead to cynicism about the world? Or inaction due to jadedness? There may actually be a bliss of ignorance. And sometimes chasing illusions can end up being beneficial, however you define that, as long as you are not consumed entirely by it.

Everything can very well be an illusion. If so, besides being more critical of the desires I have, I might as well choose intentionally which illusions I want to adopt. They might not be “true”, but they could be useful and practical. For example, I romanticize the idea of “family”— the only thing I want for sure is to have a loving family of my own. I work hard so that I can provide wealth, wisdom, and time for them in the future. “Family” might just be a social construct, but I choose to interpret it this way to find meaning in my life.

If some illusions serve us, which ones do you choose to adopt?